South Coast Exploration Adventure Ch5
Seven young people aged 16–25 set sail aboard Challenger 5 for a South Coast Exploration Adventure, taking on life at sea and everything that came with it. From Portsmouth to Cowes, Poole and Yarmouth, the crew learnt new sailing skills, worked together on deck and faced changing weather and challenging conditions along the way.
Day 1
Upon the Tide We Cast Our Vessel Free
Upon the tide we cast our vessel free,
A battered boat that groaned against the sea.
New faces, places and things to learn,
Yet for the great ocean, did we yearn.
From Portsmouth port we set our sails,
With a great ambition, we will not fail.
Upon the winch we put our force,
And southwards we took our course.
The wind on our bows, and adventure ahead,
For distant Cowes, Captain Alex led.
With Charlie’s aid, we learnt to tack,
Ready for much-needed guac.
Finally, we docked upon the pontoon,
Looking upwards towards the moon.
Sat down for dinner, laughter around,
A hard day’s work for sleep we were bound.
Day 2
We departed from a harbour so vast,
Any thoughts of sleep thou shalt leave in the past.
And in these mighty winds did we prevail,
But our struggles were meagre in the God-given gale.
Going on forth, did we sail with the day,
But on a steep incline, our vessel did stay.
Wherefore art did we do so many a tack?
We set our sights on Old Harry the Stack.
We passed the Needles, the towering spikes,
Though leaving green buoys unto our rights.
We commenced at Poole, unsightly haven!
And to our kin, we now send this raven.
Day 3
Chasing Cars – Remix – Mike’s Song
We left from Poole in the morning rain,
Put up the mainsail, did it all again.
The wind was blowing, the waves were high,
And Ruby looked like she was gonna die.
We took the wheel, we learned to steer,
Trying our best while the coast disappeared.
Grey skies above us, water everywhere,
But somehow we didn’t really care.
Oh, we sailed all day,
Through the rain, through the rain,
From Poole to Yarmouth,
Again and again.
Yankee was hungry, that much was clear,
Pesto pasta for lunch disappeared.
Then Thai green curry when the sun went down,
Best little sailor meal in the whole damn town.
Ruby was seasick, poor Ruby was green,
The roughest conditions that we’d ever seen,
While everyone else tried to hold on tight.
Day 4
IÉS À LA MER
Un jour…
Un bateau…
Une course…
Et Eva est toujours là-haut.
Aujourd’hui sur le bateau, journée tranquille,
Pas trop de vent, tout semblait facile.
Puis quelqu’un a crié : « On fait la course ! »
On a sorti le staysail, et c’était parti en force.
Tout le monde sur le pont, chacun tire sur les cordes,
Josh prend de l’avance, personne ne l’égale.
On court, on crie, on veut gagner,
Mais Josh franchit la ligne — il nous a tous battus.
Liés à la mer, liés à la mer,
Sur notre bateau, les cheveux dans l’air.
On hisse le staysail, on veut tout gagner
Day 5
PIRATE REPORT
Challenger 5 was cruising past Yarmouth, the crew dreaming of dinner, dry socks and the sweet relief of Gunwharf Quays, when the unthinkable happened.
Not children.
Not tourists.
Not even the usual over-excited yachties.
No — this time, the pirates were Tall Ships Youth Trust office workers.
And they were done with spreadsheets.
It started innocently enough. A small vessel approached, decorated with bunting made from shredded risk assessments. At the helm stood the Accounts Team, wearing eye patches made from old printer toner labels.
Behind them, HR waved staplers like cutlasses.
And leading the charge was the CEO, brandishing a hole punch with the confidence of someone who had approved too many budgets and not enough holidays.
“CHALLENGER 5!” the CEO roared. “PREPARE TO BE BOARDED! WE WANT YOUR SNACKS AND YOUR SEA STORIES!”
Eva blinked.
Tony whispered, “This is… honestly terrifying.”
Ruby added, “I knew payroll looked stressed last week.”
Sam, acting on pure instinct (and questionable judgement), grabbed Bob the Pineapple — the slightly overripe fruit he’d named earlier that morning.
He held Bob aloft like a tropical weapon of war.
“BACK OFF!” Sam shouted. “BOB IS READY TO NEGOTIATE… VIOLENTLY!”
The office pirates hesitated.
Accounts whispered, “Is… is that pineapple leaking?”
Bob dripped ominously.
Meanwhile, Second Mate Mike unveiled his secret weapon:
The pigs trotter he’d been saving for tea.
It was wrapped in foil.
It was seasoned.
It was…
fragrant.
Mike raised it like a holy relic.
“THIS SHIP IS PROTECTED BY THE POWER OF PORK!” he bellowed.
HR recoiled.
The CEO gagged.
Someone from Marketing whispered, “That’s not in the brand guidelines.”
Emmy and Jules sprang into action.
“DEFENSIVE POSITIONS!” Emmy shouted.
Jewles added, “AND SOMEONE GET ME A BUCKET — WE’RE GOING FULL ADMIN!”
Eliza, Lulu, Josh and Ruby formed a line of questionable courage along the rail.
Captain Alex tried to maintain order, shouting things like:
“THIS IS NOT HOW PARTNERSHIP MEETINGS WORK!”
and
“CHARLIE, STOP TAKING MINUTES, THIS IS A CRISIS!”
But Charlie did not stop taking minutes.
He documented everything.
Including the moment Sam threw Bob the Pineapple, missed the pirates entirely and hit Josh in the shin.
Josh screamed, “BOB HAS TURNED AGAINST ME!”
The Tall Ships office pirates, now facing:
- Bob the Pineapple,
- Mike’s disturbingly aromatic pigs trotter,
- Emmy’s bucket-based wrath,
- and Charlie’s relentless documentation,
decided they were wildly outmatched.
The CEO shouted, “RETREAT! WE’LL SEND AN EMAIL INSTEAD!”
And with that, they fled back towards Yarmouth, dropping a stapler overboard in their haste.
Challenger 5 sailed on, victorious, confused and smelling faintly of tropical fruit and old pork.
As they approached Gunwharf Quays, Captain Alex declared:
“No one speaks of this. Ever.”
Mike replied, “I’m still eating the trotter.”
Everyone groaned.
