A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away, we were in Cowes, Isle of Wight, at 6 am. Much to everyone’s displeasures, we got up miserably and got drizzled on as we set sail to cross the channel. However. Terrific Tim and his Talented Team ® cooked up a class bacon butty breakfast. Fighting through the downpour, the main sail was impressively hoisted with just two people which we’ve repeatedly heard was unprecedented. Joe got eaten. Despite the boat being horizontal and struggling to walk around downstairs we persevered and played cards. The weather cleared up giving way to the beautiful sunshine. Almost everyone was ill however chicken raps were a sweet relief on deck. With lots of napping (Chloe) and lots of miles (5,0000000000) though it felt more like 101 we reached Alderney ,via Cape Town, at sunset. We finished the day with noodles, but Sam missed out (he got eaten).

By Terrific Tim and his Talented Team ® (- joe)

Day 3 in a galaxy far far away, we woke up after a lovely lie in and cooked up a storm in the kitchen (scrambled egg with muffins). Skipper Jamie fell overboard and was saved by Timmy in a hazmat suit. Jamie was doritoed up the side of the boat. Unfortunately, he didn’t make it. We gave him a Viking funeral. The rest of the gang got a taxi to Amazing Alderney and trekked to what seemed to be a beautiful beach but turned out to be full of sewage discharge. Milo couldn’t be asked to walk any further so jumped in anyway. We left the strong swimmer to it and decided to find a non-toxic beach. When we found one, we all sprinted in and played an intense game of volleyball. While everyone else was focused on the game we didn’t see Chloe turn blue or see her float away. Hypothermia 1: Chloe 0. Soon after, Rob went on a side quest to scale the cliffs but fell off before he could reach 20cm. Fortunately, he landed on his saviour, the strong swimmer Milo (He about to drown). Rob returned to shore riding a dolphin, cradling a ball of Milo in his arms, whispering sweet nothings in his ear. Rob laid Milo on a bed of seaweed where Rob eagerly performed a passionate mouth to mouth. Unfortunately, it was all in vain as his lungs gave up on him. Milo died. On the walk back, a crazy lady on a bike, who seemed to on something fun (smarties), did a hit and run on Alex. His leg was just hanging on by a thread, so got rushed to the amputation table (A.K.A the kitchen table). Luckily Sophie had a spare fender, which was used as a peg leg. We finished the day was some lovely scran (Most ended up on Ellie’s jumper).

All in all, a good day (But not for Rob – he lost his Milo)

(some creative licence was used in the making of this blog)